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This Doesn't Feel Like Home To Me

by Death By Routine

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1.
Lost At Best 02:09
I can't sleep tonight with all these things on my mind I've traveled east and west; I guess you can say I'm lost at best And these maps and atlases can't help me find home now Stand up and find a place to call home So I know where I am but don't know why I'm here You'll never call this place home that's all I ever hear And this is one thing that I've learned: Home is not a place, home is just a feeling that you have never felt Because you're always dealing with your own negativity It's blinding you, you'll never fucking see Stand up and find a place to call home Stand up and find a place to call home Stand up, find some solid ground of our own Stand up and find a place to call home
2.
Those words, those words you said they still get to me You said, "This didn't turn out as great as I thought it would be" You might as well spit in my face and call me a disgrace Cuz' I know you think it's all my fault It's like I climbed the tallest tree Just so you could cut it down on me I'm not asking for second chances you see Cuz' I've still held on to a piece of my dignity I'll go home I'll go home, this doesn't feel like home to me Cuz' walking these streets alone is the only way I'll feel free The only way I'll feel free So like The Vandals I'll tell them that my girlfriend is dead But that wouldn't clear these troubles all stored up in my head And if you feed on my pain, then I hope that your fed Cuz' I still find it hard to sleep in my own bed It's like I climbed the tallest tree Just so you could cut it down on me I'm not asking for second chances you see Cuz' I've still held on to a piece of my dignity I'll go home, I'll go home, this doesn't feel like home to me Cuz' walking these streets alone is the only way I'll feel free I'll go home, I'll go home, this doesn't feel like home to me Because walking these streets alone is the only way I'll feel free
3.
Looks like I'll fake another smile to hide my denial Can't stand being fake all I do is shake I'm just trying to find my way out While I keep my mouth shut trying so hard not to shout: I'm drowning deeper in an ocean I don't ask for much just a little respect And a chance to succeed, so I know I'm no reject They say, (they say) "Life just gets better than this" But what if they're liars? I guess it's just hit or miss... Just don't let me miss Don't tell me I'm fine when I know that I'm not Don't tell me that I'm alone when you're all that I've got My leg is stuck in a crevice I'm drowning deeper in the bottom of the ocean I'm begging you please, just let me be anything but this, life is haunting me It's haunting me
4.
5.
I've been sitting here to long and wasting all of my time While I let you think you control my life You're just a wall in my way and you can't make me stay Because I know what's real and trust me, you're all fake I can't believe I let this get out of hand I'd rather spend my life alone than feel like this again So I'll keep gritting my teeth down 'till there's nothing left of me Or, I'll stand up for myself and be the kid that I need to be I hope you're happy putting me in a cage Teaching me to hide my emotions and all of this rage So today I'll grow up and do things my own way You better understand I'll never stay I can't believe I let this get out of hand I'd rather spend my life alone than feel like this again So I'll keep gritting my teeth down 'till there's nothing left of me Or, I'll stand up for myself and be the kid that I need to be The world wants more and more and I have nothing left to give The world wants more and more and I have nothing left to give The world wants more and more and I have nothing left to give The world wants more and more and I have nothing... Left to give I can't believe I let this get out of hand I'd rather spend my life alone than feel like this again So I'll keep gritting my teeth down 'till there's nothing left of me Or, I'll stand up for myself and be the kid that I need to be

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released August 3, 2012

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Death By Routine Mesa, Arizona

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